“Every crowd has a silver lining.”
Humour
Quotes about humour — ideas, advice and perspectives to get inspired.
“Yeah, baby!”
“I do everything Fred Astaire does, but backwards and in high heels.”
“I have a theory that the only way to get a man to do something is to tell him he's too old for it.”
“I don't know what I want, but I want it now!”
“You have to be brave to be funny.”
“I =pI Women will never be as successful as men because they do not have wives to advise them.”
“IBehind every successful man I stands a surprised mother-in-law.”
“Every man who is high up loves to think that he has done it all himself; and the wife smiles, and lets it go at that.”
“God put me on Earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now I'm so far behind I will never die!”
“Sure, I know that the Bible says to love our neighbors as ourselves. But frankly, I don't believe that my neighbors can stand all that affection.”
“Make love, not war; get married and do both!”
“' Tis better to have loved and lost, then paid for it and not liked it.”
“France is the only place where you can make love in the afternoon without people hammering on your door.”
“Last time I tried to make love to my wife nothing happened, so I said to her, 'What's the matter, you can't think of anybody either?'”
“A man in love is incomplete until he is married. Then he’s finished.”
“We are all mortal until the first kiss and the second glass of wine.”
“Some people cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.”
“To be stupid, selfish, and have good health are three requirements for happiness, though if stupidity is lacking, all is lost.”
“Whoever said money can't buy happiness didn't know where to shop.”
“There's nothing to winning, really. That is, if you happen to be blessed with a keen eye, an agile mind, and no scruples whatsoever.”
“Once you've accumulated sufficient knowledge to get by, you're too old to remember it.”
“There has been an alarming increase in the number of things you know nothing about.”
“First come I; my name is Jowett. There’s no knowledge but I know it. I am Master of this college: What I don’t know isn't knowledge.”